DAMN...spent 15 minutes centering the lyrics..and blogger didn't do it......aish.. >.<

yes, yes, it's been a long time since i've posted...i was taking a lil hiatus.. james does it all the time so I figured I would too.. =P @ James!

reading the post on 7/11 and i just noticed I spelled weather, whether..haha..wonder why i never noticed that...

my life has been consistently busy..especially with Z-Opolis in testing. we don't have quite a large number of testers, but it's just as well because we are still in the process of ironing out the little bugs. we've been pleasantly surprised by the group of testers we do have because they have been really positive and constructive..ie..no bitching and moaning.. if any of you know of a way we can get word out to teen girls about Z...ie.. contacts with any teen mags or stuff like that...please let me know~

as the people around me know, i've been stressed about particular aspects of my life...they've been very kind in helping me destress and just deal with things. i can't say that life is bad...i really like my job and feel very blessed. as far as relationships go....basically, i'm not interested. which is bizarre... i've been in and out of so many relationships in the past year that i'm starting to forget names and faces..haha..>.<..this is NOT a good thing. i did go out with this one guy last week...he is nice, but just doesn't seem to get the hint...if ever my phone blows up, you'll know why... reading jin's "I must type" post felt like I was reading something I might have written myself. (get outta my head, girl!!) i'm sick to death of worrying about other people, trying to please them, feeling guilt ridden if I don't meet up to their expectations, trying to be everyone's friend..the obedient daughter...the loyal sister..etc. it's just not worth it. i have to just "learn to let go", as someone once told me...that, I think is one of life's most difficult lessons to learn.

a friend of mine sent me the lyrics to the song "The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World, last year. he couldn't have picked a better time...i was feeling insecure about job, relationship, life, etc...reading the lyrics was really..uplifting..for lack of a better word. Here are the lyrics..

Hey, don't write yourself off yet
It's only in your head
You feel left out or
Looked down on
Just try your best
Try everything you can
And don't you worry
What they tell themselves
When you're away
It just takes some time
Little girl you're in the middle
It'll up the ride
Everything will be just fine
Everything will be all right
Hey, you know
They're all the same
You know you're doing
Better on your own
So don't buy in
Live right now
Yeah, just be yourself
It doesn't matter
If it's good enough
For someone else
It just takes some time
Little girl you're in
The middle of the ride
Everything will be just fine
Everything will be all right
It just takes some time
Little girl you're in
The middle of the ride
Everything will be just fine
Everything will be all right
Hey, don't write yourself off yet
It's only in your head
You feel left out or
Looked down on
Just do your best
Do everything you can
And don't you worry
What the bitter hearts
Are gonna say
It just takes some time
Little girl you're in
The middle of the ride
Everything will be just fine
Everything will be all right
It just takes some time
Little girl you're in
The middle of the ride
Everything will be just fine
Everything will be all right

Damn..i really need to learn some basic html..i aligned all that manually..das why it looks all snakey..hehehehe ^^

as my friend Love always says...HAVE AN AWESOME DAY~!

OMG! this is sooooo hella funny! Maritess vs. the Superfriends!

i'm feeling wierd today...maybe its the blech whether we're having down here in lovely irvine. @.@ and i have this strange feeling in my tummy....it's an achy feeling...the kinda achy-ness you get after a night of crazy drinking..the kind of achy-ness that needs PHO! ..hehe ^^ hmm...as i'm typing, i'm noticing that my bloggy is doing funnny things....maybe my word wrap thingee is broken....hmm...let me go check..

checked the bloggy and it seems alright... maybe i'm feeling antsy... i dunno... its so boring when i get home....have no bed...have no desk..have no computer.. have no tv..altho i could go out in the living room and watch t.v with rachel...but eh..dun really feel like doing that.. yesterday, i went home and laid down on my lovely air matress and fell asleep...it was a bit cold cuz, the air matress doesn't really retain heat... than all of a sudden i started getting phone calls! have i been whining to everyone about how shim shim hae (bored) i am at home? i was so happy! ouch! i just stretched my neck and it cracked...

so james said last weekend, that if he were to describe me...he'd say that i was...GOOFY! -.- goofy? O.o GOofy ?.? .......I AM NOT GOOFY! does anyone else agree with james?? am i goofy?? i dun think so....so i've been known to trip over my feet for no apparent reason, so every once in awhile i get tongue tied and say things like effinedrine...so i can sound like a greasy italian dude on the sobe commercial...my little monkey cat~ =P soo? does that make me goofy??? i think NOT! james...ur new mission..you have no choice..you HAVE to accept it..is to fine a NEW word to describe me... =P

Night at Le Prive comes to an end...finally. hehe ^^

yes, yes i know..it's been a long while since i blogged. i guess i just haven't been in the mood lately. i didn't realize how consuming this long distance relationship thing can be. but as of yesterday, the relationship is over. i've been mulling over the idea of breaking up for awhile now. things initially were fine. we were communicating and getting used to the distance. but then things went down hill..fast. our phone calls got awkward and forced and our e-mails were getting impersonal and blah. i started really thinking about what the hell i was doing and realized that i wasn't quite the happy camper i had convinced myself i was. eventually i came to the conclusion that it was time to call it quits. i think david is letting his misery consume him and it slowly started seeping into our relationship. i was going to just email him a dear john letter but was told that would be a cold, heartless thing to do. so i called him and damn..it was like pulling teeth to get the boy to talk about things. he probably felt a bit stupid cuz he was the one who was all..."i know ur worth waiting out the next 6 months for...blah blah blah." maybe it was because i had been thinking about it for so long, but i didn't really feel that sad. i did feel a sense of loss for about half an hour after getting off the phone with him, but then i physically felt an incredible weight being lifted off me and boy, did that feel good. =) what a relief! odd isn't it? i know some of you will be surprised because you probably thought he was a potential "the one" for me. to some degree i did love him. the heart is a funny thing tho...it can be quite fickle at times...hehe ^^ personality wise i think david and i got along great. but when i really got down to it, and started thinking about things realistically, i knew deep down that he wasn't quite the kind of person i could see myself with in the long run...you can come to your own conclusions about what the specific reasons are..=P
however, i can say with confidence, that i don't regret having had this relationship at all. i took a lot of risks i had been too chicken to take in the past and learned a great deal about myself. i have no ill feelings towards david and he will probably remain in my memory for a good long time... but this was definately the right decision for me. surprisingly, i have no desire to keep in touch or remain friends with him and i told him so. i think he was a bit put off by my saying that because he knows that i usually do stay in touch and remain friends with ex's. i don't know why..but this time around...i just didn't want to..

anywho's..i think this was quite an interesting episode in my life... i have had mini bouts of melancholy now and again today, but i'm sure that will soon pass. so..that's that~! Night at Le Prive has come to an end, close curtain, exit stage.

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Low
Schizoid:	Low
Schizotypal:	Low
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	Moderate
Narcissistic:	Moderate
Avoidant:	Low
Dependent:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Low
-- Click Here To Take The Test --

this is what i got the first time ..





Take the "Which Flower are you?"quiz by Hazel

so i decide to post it to show ya'll that I'M NOT EVIL!!

but then i took it again, put down the same answers...and got this...






Take the "Which Flower are you?"quiz by Hazel


i took it another couple of times with the exact same answers...and it still says i'm a lily....does this mean i really am evil??? >.< O.o

sheesh..why does it seem like those who rarely post on their own blogs are the one's that get on my case when i don't.... =P kekeke ^^

another life of my year has passed....i am now 25 years old...sigh* hehe ~.~

i've been a much happier camper as of late. i think this new job is probably the main reason... i've also been trying to get myself to let go of things i have no control over...there's no use stressing when you can't do anything about it right? there is only so much you can do before you wash your hands of the situation or get the life sucked outta ya...

i'm looking forward to moving to Tustin at the end of the month...FYI: i will be recruiting to help with the move...so don't ignore my calls! =) i have to admit i'm going to miss my sister and her dog..i've kind of gotten used to having people around when i'm at home. usually my aunt is in her room and i'm in mine and we rarely ever see eachother, so i'm pretty much solo when i get home. it's nice to have peace and quiet and just do whatever i want or not do anything at all... having my sister and her doggy around has been an adjustment, but its been okay... =)

lately, the traffic on my way home has been just atrocious... i'm so exhausted by the time i get home that i'm in no condition to do anything. yesterday, jin managed to get me out of the house. we went to starbucks with james and my sister to just chew the fat..shoot the breeze...whatevers... it was nice. =) I hope i'll have more time to do that after i move. it sucks that we all live so far apart from each other, but at least we make effort to meet up.. have to thank jin for that. =)

Z-Opolis the game were working on is progressing...slowly...but it is moving along... the stupid programmers have done such a sloppy job... its really aggravating! almost every day we're banging our heads against the wall in frustration >.< luckily i have my cute lil pillow from our x-mas party to soften the blow..keke ^^

okie das all for now... toodles~*